Say YES to Yourself:
Reduce Stress and Increase Ease
by Tom Marcoux, America's Communication Coach
Tom Marcoux’s popular presentation is
"Say YES to Yourself: Successful Strategies for Stress, Conflict and Change in the Workplace."
The following excerpts are from Tom Marcoux’s keynote addresses at hospitals and for dental professionals and
his book Communicate to Win: Influence Your Way to Success and Happiness
"To Say YES to yourself, you need to focus on two things:
1. Become stronger
2. Communicate powerfully
Become Stronger
I share techniques and skills for handling stress so that you are stronger. When we’re in a strong place, stress bounces off.
Get off the stage
Researchers have discovered that professionals that perform at their peak levels engage in "recovery." For example, a tennis pro is only at peak activity for 25 minutes of two hours. The rest of the time, the tennis pro is "in recovery." To get off the stage, you might retreat to your car, a backroom or a restroom stall, if necessary. You can practice a certain form of deep-breathing "Affirm-breathing" while you ride the elevator.
The Calm-Tai Chi Movement
Special breathing and movement release tension from the body. During my presentations, the audience enjoys "the Calm-Tai Chi Movement" which comes from the combination of my degree in psychology and training in Asian movement.
Communicate Powerfully
Reduce Conflict: Replace confronting the person with using a strawman.
Instead of confronting the person, make up a ficticious strawman -- and the strawman will get the blame. You can say, "Joe, I’m glad you brought up that idea. I’m listening carefully to what you’re saying. And I was wondering how we can help patients to appreciate Process A. How can we work together so that patients just flow with this new system?"
Identify people’s values and "sparks" -- and influence them
All of us report to someone. To find out the true requirements, you can ask, "What is most important to you in _____?" This helps you target the person’s values. The next question is to discover how the person wants things to go. You ask, "In order for you to know that ____ (value), what has to happen?" For example, Susan asked her supervisor, "In order for you know that the shift went well, what has to happen?" With this metaphor, we note that the value is "the flame" and how-the-supervisor-wants-it is "the spark."
To eliminate stress, take care of "emotional bank accounts"
An emotional bank account is the metaphor of how co-workers feel toward each other. A doctor said about staff members, "I depend on these people to make my life less stressful." When I presented this concept to an audience at Salinas Memorial Hospital, one person said, "For my department, we like bagels!" Little things are big things in disguise. I have heard nurses say, "Yes, that’s Dr. Smith, he never says ‘good morning.’" There are many ways to make deposits in emotional bank accounts with staff and patients.
Copyright 2002 The Tom Marcoux Family Ltd. Partnership
This article includes highlights from the book Communicate to Win.
Click here for more information
"Tom teaches potent tools for finding your voice and powerfully expressing yourself, essential for getting what you want in life."
Marcia Wieder, Best-selling author, PBS Television Star Making Your Dreams Come True
SPECIAL NOTE: Communicate to Win is included in the TIME CAPSULE to be opened in 2100 of Cogswell Polytechnical College (Silicion Valley, CA) -- and it is a required textbook.
A Speaker for Your Company, Association or Conference:
Tom Marcoux, America's Communication Coach is the author of Communicate to Win: Influence Your Way to Success and Happiness; Free Yourself for Success; How to Heal When Life's Too Much. Tom is a nationally known, award-winning speaker-author (Speaker of the Year, Success Builders International and BusinessAcademy.com). Tom is a sales coach and personal/professional coach. He is a faculty lecturer at Academy of Art College, San Francisco (whose graduates often work for George Lucas' companies). Tom is a member of the National Speakers Association. He speaks for the National Association of Broadcasters Conference, Las Vegas, Nevada (click here for his NAB presentation). He is a guest lecturer in venues California State University - Los Angeles, Stanford University, and De Anza College. His book "Communicate to Win" is a required textbook at Cogswell Polytechnical College, Silicon Valley and in the Cogswell Time Capsule. His private workshops and public seminars have benefited professionals from IBM, The Gap, Charles Schwab, Bank of America, Wells Fargo, Lucent Technologies, Circuit City, The Olive Garden, and many other firms. He authored 10 books which are available on-line at http://www.businessacademy.com Tom is a faculty lecturer on technical communication and digital filmmaking at Cogswell Polytechnical College. Tom is a TV/Radio guest and he has been written about in San Francisco Examiner and the magazines: Streaming, Radio World, National Association of Broadcasters Daily, Millimeter, and Sharing Ideas - The Premiere Speaking Industry Magazine. Tom is featured in the documentary "Perfect Ending."
View 34 pages of Quotes from People Helped by Tom's speeches, coaching, and products in the Guestbook
For your media project: engage Tom Marcoux, Media Specialist/Motion Picture Director-Producer-Writer-Actor:
Tom directed a previous motion picture that went to the Cannes Film Festival. He is currently directing "LIVING, the Motion Picture" -- which includes the beautiful Crystal Pegasus. He is the president of TomMarcoux.com, Inc. and Marcoux Media, and his team is preparing the science fiction trilogy of motion pictures entitled "TIMEPULSE."(www.TimePulse.com) Tom is the author of the novel TIMEPULSE. Tom won a special award at the EMMY AWARDS after earning a degree in psychology and television production. Tom is the author of 101 Acting Secrets: A Director's Tips for Your Acting, Auditions, Movie Roles, and Self-Promotion. He conducts acting workshops and workshops on "Self-Promotion for Actors"
Quotes from People Helped by Tom's speeches, coaching, and products in the Guestbook
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